Christmas has arrived at Costco!  It really is Christmas in July! And many other stores are gearing up for Halloween. This must mean summer is slowly coming to an end!

I had previously blogged about the stress of Christmas (December 2014) and then provided a few ideas on how to start getting ready for the next Christmas to hopefully make it less stressful (January 2015).

Congratulations if you did start to plan and write out your calendar when you wanted to start certain activities. This can help control the December rush! Even if you haven’t gotten to the point where you are writing in dates yet, it is not too late. You can start now. Start by re-reading my blogs from December 2014 (Christmas Stress) and January 2015 (Next Christmas).  Since Christmas is seen as a happy time of the year, but is often experienced with stress, dread, and feelings of overwhelm, taking just a bit of time now to write in dates and ideas can help the busyness of Christmas from overwhelming you.

What have you liked about previous Christmases? What would you like to do again this next Christmas?

What was too much and you would like to change for the holidays? What brings on the greatest amount of stress, anxiety, overwhelm or depression? Spend some time now time to think about how you would like to change those things.

While you have a few minutes waiting for the kids at lessons or a soccer game – start searching for events you might like to attend. Are there yearly Christmas events in your area that you vowed last year to attend but didn’t? Get a head start by seeing if there are dates already set and when you can get tickets. If the dates aren’t set yet or the tickets aren’t out put reminders in your calendar to check back regularly so you don’t miss out this year. If there are dates available get out your calendar and start to schedule in those times.

If there are pictures to be taken or cards to be bought and written, write those dates in the calendar now. Are you planning to make some cards or some of the presents this year? Write down the supplies list and when are you going to work on these projects? Then work backwards on when you need to research the instructions, get the supplies, etc.

Also start to schedule in some fun times for you and your family and friends.  Plan an evening to watch a classic Christmas movie or play a favourite game or sing Christmas carols or go for a walk to see the lights in your neighbourhood.

Since Christmas is consistently one of the most stressful times of the year, taking time to plan ahead can offer a way to mitigate some of that stress and overwhelm.


If you would like more help with general anxiety, depression, stress, or overwhelm from a specific life event, please call Heather at 604-375-3010 or email at heather@discoverycounselling.ca

Dealing with house guests over the Christmas season? Going to family events? 

Although the ads and songs call this the most wonderful time of the year, spending time with family members can sometimes be anything but wonderful! Think “National Lampoon Christmas Vacation” and Cousin Eddie! It can be stressful being around the individual who becomes obnoxious after drinking; the person who talks non-stop; or the person who always says something with which you feel uncomfortable.

If you know that you will be spending time with an individual who is not your favourite person, it can be best to plan ahead on how you want to handle the person or situation. If you know that a person starts to become belligerent once they have been drinking too much, plan an early escape. Or can you offer to help walk around with hors d’oeuvres so that you don’t get stuck with the non-stop talking relative?

• Start by picturing the individual and what their usual behaviours or lines are (you've dealt with him or her before so you know what the usual routine is). 
  

• What is the worst part of the situation? 
  

• Start to brain storm what ways you can deal with the person or situation. Get creative! Is there someone (sibling, cousins) that you can collaborate with?
  

•  If you can’t think of anything, try asking your friends or coworkers how they deal with an individual who behaves in a specific way or says certain things.  Everyone has a story about a person or situation when they felt uncomfortable or awkward and have come up with great ways to handle the difficult relatives.
  

Remember, in the end, you can only control your own behaviour and how you respond, not what the other person is doing.

As Christmas day draws near, does your level of stress continue to grow? There is a certain franticness that grows as Christmas gets closer.

By now the school plays and concerts may be over, but there are still presents to buy, wrapping to be done, food to prepare, and parties to host.  The endless “to-do” lists and thinking of “just one more thing” that needs to be done can lead to feelings of anxiety and overwhelm. Once the feelings of stress start, it can quickly spiral into feelings of guilt, resentment, and anger and thoughts of “not again”, “why am I doing this?” or “why doesn’t anyone help out?”

Last year did you vow to do things differently “next Christmas” only to feel like that Christmas has come again too fast? While it may seem that it is too late to change the feelings of chaos and overwhelm for this year, I have a few suggestions that while they probably won’t change everything this year, they can help you feel saner and make things more manageable. Some of these suggestions may be easier for you to do than others.

• Put on some Christmas music! While wrapping presents, cleaning the house and preparing food, listening to upbeat music can help relax and provide a change in mood. 
• While wrapping the presents, writing Christmas cards and even cleaning the house take a moment to be thankful that you have a house to clean, friends and family to buy presents for, and stores from which to buy safe food.
  
• Breathe…take a couple of deep breaths and feel the relaxation enter your body from head to toe. At each breath, focus on releasing tight muscles and relaxing a different part of the body working from your head down to your toes. 
  
• Ask for help. Thinking that you need to be wonder woman and do it all yourself is a sure fire way to become resentful and angry. Even those closest to you can’t read your mind and may be guessing that since you aren’t asking for help, you want to handle it all yourself.
  
• Take a short walk. Walking to the end of the driveway and back or around the block can help reduce the feelings of stress and give you a break from the noise and busyness in your house.
  
• Drink tea. Again, something you can enjoy while taking a break or if you must while still wrapping presents or other household activities. Drinking chamomile or peppermint tea can be relaxing. Try focusing on the present moment or a pleasant thought every time you take a sip of your tea. 
  
• Spend time with your pet. Cuddling, patting, playing or brushing with a pet can help to decrease your stress and may even make you smile!!
  

People tend to remember how they felt in a situation more than they will remember if there was the perfect amount of gravy or mashed potatoes. Relaxing and enjoying the moment can go a long way to make the season more pleasant for you and those around you.

Do you have favourite ways to relax and enjoy Christmas? Go and enjoy!